jillyson
Diligent Librarian 
Twozaks in Other Realms
[M0:6]"Now where have they gone? I seem to have lost my marbles again!" [ss:Luscious Lavender]
Posts: 9,634
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Post by jillyson on Apr 28, 2011 12:35:54 GMT -5
Wow! I see now why that part was important...
What an awesome chapter! I felt like I was on that dance floor with them!
Now he's going to have some trouble, when it gets around work that he's with public enemy number one's sister. As if that wasn't enough, he's gone and lost his heart, but I think everyone but him already knew that! Lol!
I know I say it all the time, but your writing really sucks me in - I feel like Adrian is really talking to me, like I'm part of the story, there as it's hapening. |
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Brianna
Studious Secretary
[M0:14]Climbing one mountain at a time.[ss:Black/Purple]
Posts: 158
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Post by Brianna on Apr 28, 2011 22:30:50 GMT -5
Really Jo? hahhaa I swear I thought all of this was crap when i was writing it. But I was like what the heck. I have nothing better to do.  I actually find it kind of cute that Adrian is falling for her  She make him feel soooooo ALIVE. I mean he's defiantly bloomed into a nice little tulip.. haha |
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jillyson
Diligent Librarian
Twozaks in Other Realms
[M0:6]"Now where have they gone? I seem to have lost my marbles again!" [ss:Luscious Lavender]
Posts: 9,634
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Post by jillyson on May 14, 2011 21:25:27 GMT -5
She's definitely bringing out a part of him that I don't think he himself realized he was missing.
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Brianna
Studious Secretary
[M0:14]Climbing one mountain at a time.[ss:Black/Purple]
Posts: 158
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Post by Brianna on May 15, 2011 23:57:43 GMT -5
Chapter 8 is now posted |
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jillyson
Diligent Librarian
Twozaks in Other Realms
[M0:6]"Now where have they gone? I seem to have lost my marbles again!" [ss:Luscious Lavender]
Posts: 9,634
|
Post by jillyson on May 17, 2011 13:14:16 GMT -5
I'll get to this asap! I can't wait to see it!!!
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Brianna
Studious Secretary
[M0:14]Climbing one mountain at a time.[ss:Black/Purple]
Posts: 158
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Post by Brianna on May 17, 2011 22:25:24 GMT -5
lol yeah its pretty short, but yet still VERY important! lol and chapter 8 has pics to go with it soooo go crazy!  |
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jillyson
Diligent Librarian
Twozaks in Other Realms
[M0:6]"Now where have they gone? I seem to have lost my marbles again!" [ss:Luscious Lavender]
Posts: 9,634
|
Post by jillyson on May 18, 2011 21:02:56 GMT -5
Those shots are great! Anyway, I left lame quickie comments on your story page, but:
I absolutely love the sexual tension between these two, and how that carries over into his everyday world. How he grabbed that girl at the station? This guy is right on the edge, and right where she put him!
He can't walk around much longer like a powder keg with a short fuse - somethings going to blow, and soon! Your writing made me feel every electric impulse going thru him - I was right there on the edge with him!
I thought he blew it when he mentioned her brother. Just goes to show that even if he pushed the thought out of his head, it's still crawling around up there.
Excellent, excellent chapter!
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